1. School friends
These friends are gold. As the name suggests, these people are your friends from school. You’ve done a lot of crazy stuff with them, like harassing teachers, deciding not to do homework, playing cricket in class and making weird noises. You grew up with them, and they were a part of your life at the growing stage. You might be friends with some of them still, but you’re not in contact with most of them. They changed every time you got promoted to a new standard. These were friendships made when you were all innocent and happy. You has no worries, and it was fun being together, doing childish stuff. Sometimes you just wish if you could go back in time and have that carefree life once again, with these buddies who made school life so much fun. But you cannot, so stop crying.
2. Best friends
You know them, you’re favourite people in the whole world who you can call at 3 in the morning asking how to make lasagna, and be sure about them answering. They know you’re creepy, weird, desperate, foolish, demanding and a total freak but they still put up with you (sometimes you judge them for why they are friends with you), mostly because they’re a total mess just like you, and also because they don’t have anybody else to be friends with. You’ve done every crazy thing there is in the book, or plan on doing that with them. When you’re low, they are the only ones who can cheer you up, not by saying that it’ll be fine, but by making inappropriate jokes trying to make you life, promising that they’re always going to be there, all the time. They’re good people sometimes.
3. Marketing friends
“Hi, I’ve started selling coconuts online and would really like if you could give my Facebook page a like, and buy some coconuts online from my website. Also if you could leave a comment saying Ranjan Coconuts are the best, it would be a great help, thanks!” You know the kind. They are the friends who only show up on your Facebook Messenger or WhatsApp asking for likes and subscribes, on their dumb business ventures or YouTube videos. They don’t care if you’re alive or not, all they need is man power to promote their products and services online, and wouldn’t care about your existence otherwise. You can block them, but they always find a way to contact you, so there’s no escape. You’re in this, deep.
4. Facebook friends
Mostly developed when you’re new to Facebook, these friends are the virtual good for nothing buddies. When you’ve just started using Facebook, you feel this uncontrollable need to send out friend requests to everyone, irrespective of whether you know them are not. At one point, you were close to some, sending each other messages on Messenger all the time, talking about likes and dislikes and boyfriends/girlfriends. You hoped you’d meet them some day and go places, but the only place you’re going with them now, is nowhere. They’re just lying around in your friend list because you’re too lazy to remove them. Now that’s a strong friendship right there!
5. “Somebody that I used to know” friends
Everyone has them, the friends who are not friends anymore. Once they were a huge part of life, where y’all have done crazy things together, taken countless selfies, swore your allegiance to each other and tagged each other on Instagram in “travelling with my best friend” photos. And here you are years later, not even able to recollect what they’re surnames are. Actually, this kind of BFF friendship is more common to teenagers, where you think that just because you see them everyday, they’re your best friends. It’s later when you realize that they were actually just stupid people you liked and start questioning whether you were mentally stable during that age or not. Just BTW, you weren’t.
6. “Happy Birthday!” Friends
You get to know whether they’re alive or not only two days in a year. One, when it’s your birthday, and two, when it’s their birthday. Facebook has taken up the responsibility of reminding people of birthdays, so you get to know when it’s theirs and they get to know when it’s yours. There is some posting on the wall and a little message over WhatsApp wishing a very happy birthday, and hoping the best for each other, along with “I hope you have a blast” mandatorily written at the end of the message. Like seriously, you wouldn’t even be talking if you both weren’t born, or if Facebook wasn’t present. But here you are, talking to the person on that one day of a year. So pointless!
7. “Are we even friends?” friends
There are some weird people in your contact list who are not your friends. They’re just people you know via someone, but they think they are your homies. They keep asking for favours, keep tagging you in some friendship related pictures, caption you as “my bff” on Instagram, and all this while you’re wondering whether you’re really friends with them, or it’s just something their mind does to cope up with loneliness. You’re pretty tired of this, but you don’t say anything because you don’t have the time, and also because this is your form of charity. Moreover, it feels good to be of importance in someone’s life. You don’t want to lose out on your fans, so you keep replying to everything they do.
8. “I don’t remember you” friends
These kind of friends are the ones you accidentally meet at the station or bus stand. You don’t recognize them, they approach you and ask random questions like “how are you”, “long time, eh?”, and “do you remember me?”. Most of the time, you don’t have the remotest idea of who they are and what they want from you. You avoid saying no, obviously because you don’t have the time to go through history, I mean you’re late for work, your boss would kill you. So you say yes, and they keep on talking about what’s been up with them and how you’re still quiet (little do they know as to what is going inside your mind). When they finally leave, you still don’t know who they are, and all you can think about the whole day is them. Damn you, guys!
“Some random friendship quote”