We’ve all been there. Family, boring birthday parties, pretending to know people you’re literally seeing for the first time, we’ve all been there. Family events are rarely fun. When your favourite cousin doesn’t turn up, or your own sibling has some exam to end, you know what pain feels like. Now that the wedding season is upon us, it becomes our responsibility to help you get through it without being either dead or worst, disowned by the people biologically programmed to love you. Here’s what to do at awkward family events –
1. Find the corner. That’s where most people don’t like to go to. You’ll find the solitude to share memes with your friends on Facebook without being in the limelight.
2. Always go with someone cool. When you’re with someone cool, you’re likely to get noticed less. Nobody will be bothered by what you’re doing when you’re with someone who is more interesting than you.
3. Sarcasm can be your best friend at such places. Compliment everyone sarcastically, around people who don’t really get sarcasm and have the best time doing that.
4. Stay near the food counters all the time. Awkward family events can only be made better when there is delicious food to munch on so you don’t pay attention to anything else.
5. Find that one person in the event whose ideologies matches with yours. There has to be someone who is cool like you. Make them your friend and get an awkward family event partner for life.
6. Do not go to your parents for rescue. They will make it worse. Stay as far as you can from your parents unless you want to dance for all the uncles and aunties present there.
7. Put on the strongest resting bitch in history so that your relatives think thrice before approaching you. It’s better to look mean than being involved in their stupid conversations.
8. Try to get two people against each other and create a fight so that you get some entertainment out of this awkward family event. Make sure that nobody finds this out though.
9. Download some games on your mobile phone because a family event doesn’t just end within some hours. It is a process that takes about as much time as a layer of soil takes to be formed.
10. Try and get your sibling along to such places so that you always have someone who will judge people with you. They can be irritating and stupid, but this is when you realize their worth.
Awkward family events, we’re ready for ya!